Dream House

Before Amanda so unexpectedly passed, we were planning our future. I wrote the following for her but didn't get a chance to give it to her.

Dream House

I dream of a house where we can live
Where we can fall in love again;
Where there's no mistake we can't forgive
Where time has erased all our pain.

I dream of a house where we can live
With no fear of an encroaching past;
Where our hopes are once again naive,
Where good times won't slip by so fast.

We'd be brave enough to take a chance;
And be, forever, man and wife.
In this house, our little girl would dance;
And we'd remember the meaning of life.

Distorted Vision

Two months ago, I went to the doctor because of a headache that wouldn't go away. After extensive testing, I was diagnosed with cataract.  Evidently, my brain was detecting vision changes before I realized that my sight was impaired.

The doctor told me that, although cataract is usually the result of aging, occasionally, young people get it. After doing some research on the topic, I found out that cataract is caused by overexposure to ultraviolet light and other electro-magnetic waves in that frequency spectrum.

In my case, I suspect that I've spent too much time in the sun without sunglasses and too much time working with microwave transmitters and receivers.

They've scheduled my eye surgery in October and in November.

In the past two weeks, the degradation of my eye sight has accelerated. Now, I can see that my vision is bad. Everything is a bit foggy and none of the colors are quite right. During the night time, I see halos around light sources (lamps, street lights, etc.).

I'm starting to wonder if what I ever saw was ever what it really was. What are the consequences of my misperceptions?  How can I make the right choices if I can not see the choices for what they are?

My eyes can not be trusted to be true.

My heart is colored by shades of grey.

I question the beauties that I pursue

And question the price that I'm willing to pay.

What must I do to discern

Which colors in my pallet are askew?

How many times must the color wheel turn

Before I can see the truth comes through.